Friday, July 17, 2009

lets BOTH make the rules :)

Kids are EVER changing!!!
I am just going to throw that out there because I feel like once I figure one kid out, they go and change on me.

Well, with Tyler, "Time out" was working pretty well. But for the past little while, I felt like I had to "enforce" it a little too often. He would not go (or not stay there) like he used to, and I ended up either spatting his bottom, or threatening to do so, just to get him back in time out. (Not quite the route I wanted to go)

So after a LOT of thought (and yes, even some fasting a prayer........I really want to do what is best for my kids and not feel like a bad mom at the end of the that possible?!!!) Peter and I came up with a way that I think is working better then ANYTHING I have ever tried before.

Peter and I sat down with Tyler and ASKED HIM what he thought we should do if he misbehaves.
He said he wanted to be put in time out. We said okay, but that he would have to go RIGHT when we told him to go. We also told him he had to set his own timer and not come out of his room till the timer went off. Fair enough.
Well, Tyler has also been telling fibs lately. So we told him that if he were to lie, his mouth would meet a bar of soap. He accepted that.

THEN, I also set some rules for ME. I was NOT to spat his bum or raise my voice or I would be put in time out. He was a little too excited to hear that part. ;)

The soap for telling fibs has been AWESOME!!! In fact, now I don't even have to ask him if he hit Nathan, or teased Audrey (to which he used to lie and say no) he now comes to me and tells me what he did. Wow!

When I tell him to go in time out, he runs and sets the timer, then goes to his room without me having to enforce it.

And the other day, I raised my voice at Nathan, and Tyler said "mom, you need to go in time out now. We don't yell.......remember?!!" ha ha!
He set the timer, put me in time out, and then told everyone not to talk to me till my time was up. ha ha!
I do have to admit, sitting there in time out, all by gave me time to really think about what I had done and realize I didn't want to do it again.

I am really happy with how the rules TYLER set up are working. I guess its not just mother and father who know best. :)

1 comment:

Jess said...

This is actually suggested in classroom discipline courses. You have the class create their own rules and enforcements, with veto powers by the teacher, of course. I like especially that you have a little time out if you raise your voice. I need that too sometimes. :)